Knife Man Gift of the Magi Intro: (Barre) Em Dm (power chord) C G G C G (Done quickly) I used to be a dead guy G C G (done quickly Now I'm a f***in' Jedi Em D And I've got lots of news for you Em D C And I've got a long list of things to do G C G (Done quickly) I used to dwell on the present G C G (Done quickly) I used to be so Hesitant Em D But now I've got my whole life to live Em D Am Cm (staccato) And I've got all my love to give to all you f***ers that I hayayate G C G It's like the Gift of the Magi G C G It's like the Gift of the Magi 2! Em D You sold your soul to buy some t**s Em D I sold my soul to grow a diiiiiiick G C G We've gotta get him in the van G C G What if he resists? Em D Kick him in the back of the f***in' head Em D Put him in the back of the f***in' Vayayayan G C G It's a miracle of science, G C G This portrayal of violence Em D It lives inside us all Em D it lives inside our hearts Am Cm (staccato) Just like a stupid f***ing tape wooooorm Play into Who can we blame? G C G The husband divorced his wife G C G after she cut her hair Em D because she was way less f***able Em D And that's just unforgiveable G C G Moved into a condo G C G and hung out by the POOOL Em D He never wore a bathing suit Em D Because he wanted scope out the talent G C G If god doesn't like ugly G C G He does't like anybody Em D fvck god anyway Em D He's osbsolete Am Cm (staccato) My god thinks my jokes are funny Intro There is no one to blame People are just f***in' mean American Tune C/Bb - x12010 C C C Am I am white and I've got everything I need. F G C No one clutches their purse when they're in a room alone with me Am and I can drive through any neighborhood I please F G C at any hour and the police don't do a thing. F G Am So if I see a penny on the ground, F G Am I leave it alone or f***ing flip it. F G Am I'm a straight white male in America. F G C I've got all the luck I need. C Am I'm a guy getting paid more than a girl with a degree F G C and I can walk down the street at night and no one wants to rape me. Am And I can get a girl pregnant and just as easily flee. F G C Just like my straight, white male dad did to me. F G Am So if I see a